February 28, 2012


There's a slightly amusing story about our cat after the picture, if you don't want to read the first three paragraphs. TIME IS MONEY AND YOU PEOPLE ARE LAZY.

I find myself being...angry. Often. Not really at anything. Well, I mean - someone will say something and I will immediately get pissed off. But it's not like people have gotten more annoying (maybe) - I just get upset more quickly these days.

I'm not sure if it's stress from school or what, but I don't like it. As hard as this may be to believe for the people who know me, I don't really enjoy being irritable. I'd much rather be the slightly psychotic me who is just a little too weird to be seen out in public with.

I can see why people would want to avoid both sides of me...I'm not sure I could be my friend...but I think one would prefer happy and weird as opposed to pissy and weird. PISSY IS A WORD, BLOGGER.COM! Don't let that last sentence detract from my post. Also, I added "pissy" to my dictionary. It wanted me to change it to "pussy." That's not polite, Blogger.com.

In other news, I turned the shower on on Chairman this morning. It was great.

Now hear me out - it's not like I threw him in there and turned it on. And he didn't get as wet as the pictured feline. But every time we go to take a shower, he comes running in there and...watches. He gets between the clear curtain and the black cloth curtain and just...watches. And when you get out he plays in the tub. Just recently he's taken to running into the bathroom, hitting the black curtain, and jumping in the tub. So it's covered in hair and has all those pulls in it from his claws snagging it. I'm tired of animals destroying our things. We do it enough without any help. So today, when I pulled the curtain closed and Chairman ran in and actually jumped all the way in the tub, I turned the shower on and listened to him flail.

I couldn't even watch because he was behind the curtains. And that is the most tragic part of this story.

February 27, 2012

Posty Post


I stayed on campus to grade papers, so of course I'm writing a post. A posty post, to be exact.

This one is about links. And how hilarious I am. Seriously. Hilarious. I have my own blog. All bloggers are always funny - didn't you know?

I've discussed my friend MC before. His nickname is one of my less creative ones... Anyway. (I typed "Andyway" for some reason. I don't even know an Andy...) Anyway - he posted something about Firefox vs. Chrome. I think he did it just so he could argue, because he knew how people would respond (people like Chrome, man...it's okay - we're all different). And he wanted to make sure people knew he was right, so every time he posted on the thread he would link back to a source.

Here are some screen shots. Yes, I chose snippets based solely on the quantity of links - it's my blog, I can skew the data. :P And it's not really skewed. He posted a lot. And there were a lot of links. Oh! I did some calculations with my helpful friend-face MS Word: 5 posts came from him, with 1635 words. 23 links, 12 of which were just the word "Link" Also about 6 misspelled words. But that's not as important. Except to prove he's not as perfect as he thinks. DOUBLE :P :P (is that four :P's or just two?)

I don't care one way or the other about browsers. I use Chrome because...I just started using it. It was new and I tried it and I was like "oohh...this is fun" and just kept going with it. I didn't bother to post that on the forum, because I know MC and know I would just get yelled at for it. As several people did.

But after that third post (that was the entire post, btw) that had as many links titled "Link" as it had sentences I was like...oh this is too much. I must make a joke. So I replied to it with this:

For some reason Blogger is being a temperamental whoreface and won't let me make the image a link. I could go into the HTML and try to do it, but whatever. In the forum it was a link to this video. Which, if you know me, is my FAVORITE VIDEO OF ALL TIME.

Well. He didn't think it was funny. And removed my comment. And took away some "contribution to community" points that I had acquired. I have no idea if the points thing is true. I don't pay attention to how many points I have. When he told me he had deleted it for "trolling" I just brushed it off with "Whatever - it was worth it." because it had amused me. And there were three other people in my office - I told them and they lol'd. He said they were really just wishing I would stop thinking I was funny and that a Rick Roll would have been better. WHAT IS THIS, 2007?! (Yes, I did Wikipedia it to get the right year.)

Also, I Rick Roll'd one of my homework assignments (the chorus over and over in 2pt font across the top of the page) a few years ago and he still says crap about it. But that's an aside.

And I do use links a lot, but they don't break up the text with a gross "Link" that breaks your train of thought. Link I mean...that's just Link silly. Link It just totally ruins the feel of a post. Link It's even causing me to lose focus on Link what I'm Link try Link ing to talk Link a Link bou Link t.

ALSO - my only misspelling are on purpose. Like posty. It's just fun. Posty. Weee!!


February 22, 2012


I try to not complain about campus construction, because making campus better is a good thing. And I choose to assume that they are making good changes.

But holy balls, people.

They already closed down the entire Rec Center lot for "construction parking" - the construction workers don't use 3/4 of the lot. So Mr. T and I have to park in the gravel lots and walk along the construction zone fence beside the Rec Center to get around to the front. Because there is no parking in that tiny lot out front, and getting there is pure misery thanks to that roundabout and construction on the stupid Student Union building.

This morning I drag my sick butt out of bed, get Mr. T's butt out of bed, get all our stuff together, park in the gravel lot full of puddles, walk through the rain in our workout clothes (we only have shorts), dodge traffic to cross the street, walk the entire length of the fenced-off lot, and turn to go down the side of the building.



There is no other way to get to the Rec Center! It would be another 5-10 minute walk to get all the way around the lot to come at it from the front of the building. In the cold, cold rain. They really should put a sign at the beginning of the sidewalk, so you know it's pointless before you walk past all the discarded condoms and misery back behind the softball field.

Also, why is the softball field all the way on the other side of campus than the baseball field? That's just weird.


February 19, 2012

Sunday Movie Review

With such memorable quotes as:
"There's a dick in Angela's mouth!"
Plus many, many more I can't remember because it's been a few months since I watched it...how can you not want to watch this movie??

I mean, come on. It's about an alien that takes over Ron Jeremy's penis and goes on a killing spree. This movie is a masterpiece.

Okay, maybe not a masterpiece. It's not even all that great. But it's funny. And if you have a Netflix instant queue you should definitely check it out. I think you can even watch it in bits on YouTube.

Sorry that this one doesn't go into as much detail as my last one. But I like this movie more than I liked Limitless (I don't want to ruin the plot before you can see it!), and it's been much longer since I watched it, so the details are fuzzy. I do remember at one point the penis hides in a dead rat to sneak up on them. DO YOU REALLY NEED MORE CONVINCING??

February 18, 2012

Saturday Product Placement

IMDb, how I heart thee.

I was watching Bones, right? During one of the episodes - "The Cinderella in the Cardboard" - this lovely face appears:

And I go "Oh! I know her!! She's whosit on Big Bang, right??" So with some Googling and IMDbing I find Ms. Mayim Bialik's IMDb page! I also discover she was in some terrible 90s show called Blossom, and was in  Beaches! AND she was on an episode of What Not to Wear! (Which you better believe I'm going to be looking up!!)

A few episodes before - "The Princess and the Pear" - I witness this lovely scene:

And now I know the name of that weird kid on Glee! (Note: searching for "weird kid on glee" is not helpful) His name is Josh Sussman (IMDb) and you will see him in...nothing of note, other than Glee, if you consider it note-worthy. Fun fact, though - he's credited as "Afro Geek" in Bones, which is a pretty sweet Superhero name. Or a band name, perhaps...

Also, it helped straighten out the whole "Spock isn't Bill from Kill Bill isn't the guy from Sucker Punch" (very confusing) conversation I had a couple years ago with some friends.



They don't look the same, until you see them in a movie and go "Oh, that's Leonard Nemoy!" or "Oh, that's the guy from Kill Bill!" Or "Oh! . . . " - yeah, no one ever thinks of Scott Glenn, I'm sure. I mean, maybe you do. I do think he's the most attractive of the three, based off their IMDb pictures. He's apparently been in lots of things. I know that because I just scanned his IMDb page (thank you, IMDb).  But I wonder if you knew it was him, or just thought it was Spock...

Or maybe Spock is real and visits Earth disguised as one of these three men. Or maybe Spock is real, and a time traveler and has come to Earth from three different times all at the same time, which is why they all three exist here together and don't look exactly the same.

Just some things to think on. What was I talking about originally? IMDb? Yeah, it's great.

February 11, 2012

Saturday Product Placement

Today I think I'm going to talk about Minecraft. Mmm... It's such a delightful game!

You can do whatever you want when you play Minecraft. I have friends - MC and Cheese - who have a system. They have it down to a science, man. As soon as they start a world they're like little ants *scurry scurry scurry* running around, getting stuff done...it's a work of art. Within the first few hours they've already started constructing massive houses, are mining for supplies, have those freaky mob masher things - whatever they're called.

Now me, on the other hand - I tend to be a bit more chaotic and unorganized. I've tried to tag along with them and it's just not fun to me. I like to wander around...find an interesting looking blob of a mountain (once I found one that kind of looked like Yoshi!!)...and start building. It's...organic... My houses are confusing, disorganized, and AWESOME. MC and Cheese don't get it at all. But it's okay, because Minecraft gives you ultimate freedom. They're not "winning" while I'm "losing" or vice-versa. We're all just...playing.

You can also have the mobs turned off and just create. People have built amazing structures. I could post links and videos, but I'm too lazy and have to go do stuff now. If you haven't played it yet, I think you can try out an old version for free on their site. It's definitely worth the $15-20 you pay for it. Even if you're not a "gamer" you'll have fun with this one.

Also - PONIES!!!

February 10, 2012

Friday Tunes


Lady Doctor

"Gynecologist" is so hard to spell. Why doctors gotta be so complicated? Is it just another way for them to feel superior?

Gentlemen, you may not want to read any more past this point.

I have an appointment in...less than an hour. Woo! I always get freaked out beforehand. It's just so awkward. You gotta get all naked, and then they feel around in your most special spots. I know it's been said before, but geeze...I wish they'd buy me dinner first.

My friend eLLe went for the first time a couple weeks ago. She's never had sex or even used a tampon, but she's getting married and wanted to get on BC. When they tried to...go in...it hurt her, so they said they'd just wait until after she had sex. !!! Way to freak someone out!

I'm most stressed about the weight thing. I know I've gained weight since last year. And I had gained 10lbs that year. Is it going to be another 10? Am I going to go up 10lbs every year until I'm morbidly obese and disgusting?? I'M WORKING OUT - DON'T JUDGE ME, DOCTOR LADY!!

This part is kind of awkward - feel free to skip.

Also, my period started on Monday. I called to make sure it would be okay and they said it would be fine as long as I was "light" and not "medium to heavy." I assume I'm "light" - I don't think I've ever been "heavy" based on horror stories I've heard. That's kind of a subjective thing, I think. And it's just going to make everything that much more awkward. I panic about being gross anyway - now I'm actually going to be gross.

Alright, out of the awkward zone. For the most part.

Anywho - I've got to head out. I'll report back in when I return from getting felt up and poked and prodded. Oh! I was reading about going to the doctor on your period and the article said at one point they're supposed to do a rectum exam. ohnothankyouplease Either I've blocked it out or that has never happened to me. And I'm not about to bring it up today.


Six pounds! I only gained six this year. Huzzah! As a reward, I ate some Popeye's Chicken. Don't question it, just move on. I told the doctor my libido (oh snap, I'm telling all now) had dropped while on the pill and Mr. T was not too excited about that. I asked about other options and she mentioned an IUD. Anyone have any experience with that? Mr. T has heard terrible terrible things. I've heard no things.

I like the idea of not having to worry for 5 or 10 years about birth control. I would prefer the 5 year, I think, because it's gonna come out sooner than that, anyway, probably. The 10 year is copper, which worries me because I (or at least my ears) have always been sensitive to metals. The 5 year still has hormones - to cause periods to be lighter. She said some women don't even have a period. That weirds me out. I haven't missed a month since I was 12 and had my first.

Anyway - any opinions? Horror stories? Amazing BC that you use?

I Googled "lady doctor" and this was one of the more fantastic options I was given. ALSO - go to that source and read it. It amused me. I have no idea what that site is about, but it made my day.

Another side note: Check out the vulva cupcakes. So gross. So, so gross. And Mr. Bearded-Man-Who-Thinks-It's-Bad-If-You-Don't-Masturbate can be all "distressed" and "heart broken" that I don't think it's some sort of magical women's freedom moment to have our genitalia made out of fondant and put on a cupcake. SOME OF THEM ARE BLOODY.

February 7, 2012


Es-Qui-Ell, No Es-Qui-Ell?

Es-Qui-Ell, No Es-Qui-Ell?

Oh Lord...I made him laugh during his presentation.


Good day.

February 6, 2012

TMI Baby Update

No babies this month!

Which explains the moody alcoholism last night and the barely fitting into pants this morning. And also why that doesn't make me any less depressed. Woo - no babies.

February 5, 2012


There are many different moods I can become when I drink. Happy, loud, hyper...those are all representative of a good night. Tearful, moody, angry...those all mean a bad night. Tonight it looks like things are turning bad. I'm very disappointed. Especially since the team I randomly chose minutes before the Super Bowl started won in the last glorious minute of the game... I was not anticipating my night ending like this.

Boo, alcohol. Tonight my teetotaling parents win. Alcohol is bad.

February 2, 2012


I'm tired. Really, really tired.
I am so sleepy.
I should really sleep more. Fin.

edit: This was supposed to be my "tired" haiku, but I just found out they are 5-7-5, not 7-5-7. Now it's just...nothing.

February 1, 2012

Resolutions Update #1

Alright, time for a little update on my Resolutions post from early January.

Working Out!
Today Mr. T got a four-month membership to the campus rec center and we worked out for an entire hour! That's an hour more than we've worked out any other day in months!

Eating Healthier!
That's another thing we're starting today (kind of)! For the entire month of February there will be no fast food, or even restaurant food. It will all be food that comes from our house that we got at a grocery store. Which is actually not really about eating healthier so much as it is about...

Saving Money!
This actually wasn't a resolution from before. Anyway - for the month of February we're going to be misers. No going out to bars, restaurants, movies... Anything that might be fun and exciting but that will also cost money. Wish us luck!

I had thirteen posts in January. That's the most I've had since last September - the month I started blogging.

Hey - I found it! That's a big step in the right direction. Now I just need to...find it again...and start writing in it!

Not sure if you remember this little post or not...but I got a haircut! I still haven't taken any "normal hair" pictures, though. I just have the crazy Paul Mitchell 'do. But whatever. It's still not exactly how I want it, but eLLe's wedding isn't until June. Hopefully it will just get more and more awesome.

Adult-Like? Organized? Crafty?!
Okay, let's ignore the rest of the list for now. I'm off to a good start! It's been less than a month, people!!